A Layman’s Guide to The Shut​-​Ups

by The Shut-Ups

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  • An introduction to the music of The Shut-Ups to enlighten the ignorant. Featuring song-by-song commentary from Don Condescending.

     

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credits

released June 15, 2012

All tracks produced by Christopher Snell and Jason NeSmith at Bel Air Studio, Athens GA and Magic Foot Studio, Atlanta, GA.

All songs written by Don Condescending, copyright 2000 – 2017, Down Syndrome Superhero Music, ASCAP.

Compilation prepared by Thaddeus Thompson, MBA

Thanks to Shut-Ups present and past not appearing on these recordings:
Guitars: Venus de Menace, Casey Clouseau, Jason Mask

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about

The Shut-Ups Atlanta, Georgia

We're a five-piece new-wave power-pop band from Atlanta and Athens, GA and practice daily at 6AM. We do more before 8AM than most bands do all week.

We're not about Pleasure or Fun. You may enjoy listening to us. You may not. You may pretend to enjoy us because others you respect seem to. They may be pretending, too. In which case you may want to consider what else they're pretending about.
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Track Name: Good Music
Here I am at the rave
It’s a scene from beyond the grave
I don’t know if we’re damned or saved
But at least we’re excited

I’m hanging out by the door
I won’t get on the floor
What did I come here for?
Why was I invited?

Though I’ll stay behind
From the bump and grind
If I could find
Good Music
I would dance

Maybe I’m sick
Or maybe it’s just my shtick
Maybe I’m just a dick
Who doesn’t play well with others

Ah, but what if I’m not
And everything’s gone to rot
And nothing that’s really hot
Is ever discovered?

Though my heart’s resigned
To a nevermind,
If I could find
Good Music,
I would dance

When it comes I want to be there with you
When it comes I want to be there with you
But will you still be dancing?

I’m not gonna volunteer
To hang from the chandelier
But if I hear
Good Music
I’ll dance
If I could hear
Good music,
I would dance
Let me hear
Good Music
And I’ll dance

So keep on dancing
Keep on dancing
I’ll see you in a while
When I’m ready
Track Name: Becky B. (It's Summer)
It’s summer
And no one goes to school anymore
It’s summer
And no one knows the rules anymore

I’m running through the streets
No more shoes, I go in bare feet
It burns but I don’t care
Okay to get hurt if you’re going somewhere

And Becky B. said,
We’re gonna try something new.
It was against the law.
Now it’s...fine.

It’s summer
And nine-year olds are drinking champagne
It’s summer
So no one’s in the mood to complain

And I used to be small
But now it doesn’t matter at all.
Becky plays with me
And she will let me kiss her, maybe.

And Becky B. Said,
We’ve had to wait so long.
But now we do what we want
All the...time.

As I run, the grown-ups drive away
(On the wrong side of the street)
Making love as they go by
(Speeding down the road)

They’re not looking out
They don’t care if they crash
And I
Want to be them.

Here I am at last!
Teach me something, teach me real fast
Becky’s in the nude
And I know what makes you a girl or a dude.

And Becky B. says,
Sit on my butt, she says.
I’ll make you happy.
And she’s...right.
Track Name: Don't Get Me Started
No they won’t
Not tonight
It’s too late
They’re Too Tired

Who am I?
No one yet
I’m concerned
I will be

They’re playing Teddy Pendergrass
This can only mean one thing
They’ll give me no consideration
I have a say in my own creation!
If they could hear me I would sing:

Don’t Get Me STARTED

Oblivion
Gets such bad press
Consider these
Talking points:

No heart to break
No skin to crawl
No eyes to cry
No soul to grieve

Even old King Solomon
Once was heard to mourn:
“Lately I’ve been disenchanted
I’ve got a wish and it won’t be granted
I wish that I were never born.”

The opposite of Murder one
Is just as bad a crime
To take a man from a world of maybe
And make him, make him, make him your baby
But it’s the victim doing time

But DON’T GET ME STARTED on time

DON’T GET ME STARTED
No, DON’T GET ME STARTED
I’m gonna be so pissed
Once I exist

DON’T GET ME STARTED
No, DON’T GET ME STARTED
It’s a race that can’t be won
Don’t fire the starting gun

DON’T GET ME STARTED
No, DON’T GET ME STARTED
If this is how the world begins,
Cue the violins

DON’T GET ME STARTED
No, DON’T GET ME STARTED
Pendergrass forfend!
Put this madness to an end.
Track Name: My Brother Gets All the Girls
At night, they come a’ knockin’
They line up at our front door
I hide away in my room, I pray
The knocks will come no more

Well, I know he’s my kid brother
And I’m glad he’s doin’ well
But he’s having fun while I’m getting none
I wish he’d go to hell

The only thing I got is this little ditty
But it’s over too soon and it isn’t too pretty
And he wrote all the words cuz mine were shitty

My brother gets all the girls
My brother gets all the girls

The girl I should have married
She said she needed room
Now she’s got my nephew
Kickin’ inside her womb

Even my mother adores him the best
His prospects are good and he’s much better dressed
And he’s not like me, all scrawny and depressed
So much for my mother

My brother gets all the girls
My brother gets all the girls

(Phone rings)
Hello?
No, this is his brother
He’s out right now I don’t know who he’s with
I don’t know when he’ll be back
Look, you don’t need to call again tonight, okay?

I said Dear God, please listen,
I don’t mean to whine
But are you playing favorites?
Just give me a sign
He said, call back: I’m on the other line
With your little brother

My brother gets all the girls
My brother gets all the girls
Track Name: I'm Pretending to Be a Robot
I possess certain feelings.
I can feel them grow and grow.
But I’m pretending to be a robot
So she’ll never know.

My circuits are firing
Look at that robot go!
Got a jam in the wiring
But it doesn’t show.

Oh.

Look at me on the dance floor:
Steady as a drum machine.
The lady’s in silver sequins:
My dancing queen.

Well, you know what happens later;
She’ll play with the machinery
And she’ll marvel at modern science.
Good for me.

Once she felt my beating heart.
I said, don’t you break that part.

Oh.

I possess certain feelings.
Show them and the girl will go.
But I’m pretending to be a robot
And she’ll never know.

Though we may be electrifying
She’ll never see what I’m denying.
She’ll never realize
I love her so.

Oh.
Track Name: What's A Booty? (Short Attention Span Edit)
I was drivin’ all night on eighteen wheels
I changed the dial
Electronic squeals commanding me
To lose my dull, old-fashioned ways

Not sure what this is all about
But sign me up; I’m gonna check it out
I’ll find a nightclub and proceed to boogie down
I’m ready...

But what’s a booty?
What’s a booty?
I’ve got to move
With the groove
So what’s a booty?

I’m told it mends the broken heart
It heals the soul, and it makes you smart
It sates the urge for something greater than yourself
And I’m ready...

But what’s a booty?
What’s a booty?
Hands in the air
Like I don’t care
But what’s a booty?

And I will be accepted like a brother
The women there will love me like my mother
Bless her heart, she’d be so proud
So proud of me

Goodbye to beer and barbecues
I’ll trade these boots for a pair of dancing shoes
The folks back home won’t recognize me anymore
And I’m ready...

So what’s a booty?
What’s a booty?
You’ve got to move
With the groove
So what’s a booty?
Track Name: It's the Law (You Have to Party!)
I get back from work
The door is open
DJ scratchin my Bee Gees records
There’s boozy bimbos
Hungry hippies
And a dancing doofus
He’s shouting something:

“It’s the law:
You have to party.
Don’t you know it’s the law?”

They refuse to leave
So I call the sheriff
She arrives
With rope and handcuffs
She ties me down
And joins the party
I try to protest
She just says:

“It’s the law:
You have to party.
Don’t you know it’s the law?”

I express some doubt
So I’m sent to prison
Vicious killers
They won’t come near me
They seem to feel that
I’ve crossed a boundary
I’m quite the scandal
I hear them whisper:

“It’s the law:
You have to party
You know it’s the law.”

Hello, Electric Chair
It’s you and me now
If I were sorry,
They’d show me mercy
But a man don’t like
What a man don’t like
And I don’t like parties
So let me die!
So let me die!

It’s the law:
You have to party!
Let me die, let me die, let me die!
Track Name: It Hurts To Be Seen
I once kissed a girl, but I’m told it was kind of a joke.
Just your basic first base; we’re not talking about any tongue.
Was that the peak of my success? I guess.
Once I dared to dream of tenderness.

Yeah it hurts to be seen
By a girl like you
I’m alone, I’m alone
With my love

I’ve practiced my lines in the mirror I pose with a smoke.
But out in the world, it’s like talking without any tongue.
Yes, I cry a little bit, I admit.
But when I cry, I have a reason for it.

Cuz it hurts to be seen
By a girl like you
I’m alone, I’m alone
With my love

And I have decided this isn’t for me anymore.
Track Name: I Hate People
Hey, I got a secret
Nobody knows it
Come closer
Let me whisper in your ear:
I hate people

Hey, what did you say?
You got a secret?
Nobody knows it
You’re gonna tell me
What you’ve wanted me to hear:
“I hate people”

Hey, so we agree about that
Does that mean we’re in love?
Were we meant to be?
Negative.
I can’t wait til I get home
I hate people
Track Name: We Will Civilize You
All your life,
You’ve been looking for some action
And you get what you want
But no satisfaction

Free your ass
And your mind will surely follow
Til your mind’s entirely swallowed
Up your ass

But we...we are here
And you...you are here
And we will civilize you

We’ll dress you up
We’ll give you a shower
Make of you a nation
We got the power!

How were you to glean
That your way of life was so unclean?
Your lame-o friends were never any use.
Sure, we sympathize
They never said, “be civilized”
But now that you have us there’s no excuse!

You may think
The beating of the drums
Is a summons from the jungle
But it’s not

We’re at your door
You’re late for an appointment
Knock knock, who’s there? We are
-to wake you!

We...we are here
And you...you are here
And we will civilize you
Track Name: Imaginary Dancer
I saw a movie tonight
I always laugh at the wrong time
I’m sure you’d say to yourself
“Why does he laugh at the wrong time?”
If I have no social grace
Just let me explain

My imaginary dancer
Has been with me so long
I don’t remember
What it was like to be a man in need
Because she reads my mind
And she takes my lead
And to me, she is more than a woman

Sometimes I see through her smile
And I know that I have retreated
She only came to my side
So I wouldn’t feel so defeated
But when I see how people are
I know I can’t complain

My imaginary dancer
Will meet with me tonight
In some enchanted dancing hall where fantasy meets fact
And she will hold me close
Til the lights go black
I’m so lucky I have such a partner

She is words and music
I am skin and bone
But we will dance till doomsday
Thank God I’ll never be alone
Track Name: Richard Hell
Richard Hell
When you were a punk star
I was only five years of age
You cut your arm
But meant no harm
Burned down a farm
Just to watch the fire rage

You were alone inside your head
So you said
Let me out of here!

Who said it was good
To be alive?
You’re still alive
You’re Richard Hell

Richard Hell
You’d forgotten where the other world was

Riding high
On my daddy’s shoulders,
I had never heard tell of you.
I could find
Outside my mind
A world so kind
Did you never have a dad?

I was a child, but so were you
You were, too,
Mr. Richard Hell!

You said it’s no good
If I’da known you
I’da shown you
Something good

Richard Hell
You’d forgotten where the other world was
Track Name: Just Another Generation
When we were born
On New Year’s Rockin’ Eve
The world was heard to say, “so what?”
So we gave the world some drugs
And a magic tambourine
We grew its beard
Removed its pants
And placed a yellow daisy up its butt

So what’s this crap they’re playing on our station?
“JUST ANOTHER GENERATION”?

Well, we were born
To see the end of time
We were chosen from the rest
Four hundred million years of “what’s up?” “Nothing much.”
Now we all seem to agree that we’re uniquely cursed
Or blessed.

The objects of eternal fascination
Not JUST ANOTHER GENERATION

So when you’re bored
And feeling pretty small
Don’t be The Boy Who Never Cried
“Wolf,” he never said.
And wolf, there never was.
Perhaps you’ve never heard of him
He never did some things, and then he died

Bequeathing his benumbed imagination
To JUST ANOTHER, Baby, JUST ANOTHER, Baby…
JUST ANOTHER GENERATION.

Oh, Look out: Here comes ANOTHER one!!!
Track Name: Too Late For Disco
Everyday - up at eleven
Everyday - crawl out of bed
And check the messages to see if anyone cares

Everyday - beer and a light lunch
Everyday - radio buzzing
Dimly I can hear the ghost of ‘79.

Think of showing up for work
Go to bed instead

Feet would be steppin’
Knees would be bending
Hands would be pointing
Hips would be shaking
Hearts would be breaking, but it’s…

Too late for disco
It’s never coming back again
Am I just a man without a God?
Too late for disco
I’m never havin’ fun again
Once I was “fantastic”, now I’m “odd”

Everyday - browse through the porno
Everyday - once I could score, though
No one had a camera on that magical night

Ride the stationary bike
Back in time

Back to the nightclub
It was exclusive
I was good lookin’
I was the future
Whatever happened?
Now it’s..

Too late for disco
It’s never coming back again
Like a lost and lonely butterfly
Too late for disco
I’m never havin’ fun again
And I will wear this frown until I die.

Recall a girl from long ago
Did she like me?

Look in the mirror
Pose like a rock star
Pose like a salesman
It isn’t fair they had to make me a salesman

Now it’s too late for disco
I’m never havin’ fun again
When all that I was dancing for is gone
Too late for disco
It’s never coming back again
But I go on and on and on and on

And it hurts more and more
Everyday.
Track Name: Gotta Get Rid of Myself
There’s a place we can go
Nobody’s on their tippytoe
Do you want to go?

There’s a place where we make sense
Speaking only in the present tense
No consequence

We’ll go, but there’s one little problem…

I’m with me
So I can’t be what you want
But we’re gonna find a solution:

I gotta get rid of myself
Then we’ll be okay

But here we are with this introvert
(Here you are with this introvert)
His terror level: red alert
So he won’t get hurt
(So I won’t get hurt)

So self protective (so self-protective)
And there’s no corrective
Send him back
He’s defective (I’m defective)


But he’s me, and that’s our little problem…

I’m with me
So I can’t be what we want
Me to be
(It’s inconvenient as hell)

But there is a final solution:
I gotta get rid of myself
Then we’ll be okay
Track Name: Other Bands
Why do you listen to other bands?
Why are they not discarded?
Might you be squarer
Than a bell-bottom wearer?
Might you be retarded?

While you were listening to other bands
We were kicking asses.
Your daydreams endow us
With all kinds of prowess
But you serve other masters

Other Bands
Other Bands

It’s not that we need you -we’re superstars-
But it’s sad you have no clue
Flitting around
Never settling down
With the one true band for you

So if we don’t see you when we’re back in town
We will understand
That you are a fool
And you’ll never be cool
Til you dump those other bands

Why do you listen to other bands?